Connected

Tonight, as I pulled my cheesy fork out of the fondue bowl, I watched as the strings of cheese intertwined with the cheese on my friends' forks- that were also dipping in the bowl  (this is how Ebowla spreads...:). We were eating  our first course together around the dining table in my neighbor's apartment.  There were six of us all together.  People I have been connected with for the past few months, people I have lived in the same building with, a girl I just had met that night.  But we all shared from the same bowl.  And we all laughed as we struggled with the changing form of cheese as it cooled, which eventually looked like spaghetti.  My neighbors and friends had a dinner party Sunday night that we organized by delegating a different course to each person. Course number one was quattro formaggi fondue.  When eating becomes a fun experience, in addition to being savory, it creates the best outcome.  The event of doing dinner together brought us together in more ways than the stringy cheese conveyed from its tangible form.

I was responsible for preparing the second course.  I decided to take on the task of making my grandmother's recipe for "Sunday Sauce"- gravy with meatballs and sausage.  I learned that the Italian name for this recipe is "Polpette e salsiccie al sugo".   I used to make this recipe frequently when I lived in Hoboken.  I learned the recipe from my grandma Bianca by watching her cook in the kitchen, as well as reading her recipe and hearing her extended commentary.  According to my Italian friends, I have mastered this recipe to a T---apparently it tastes as authentic as possible to Italian standards.  Brava a me!

I am not sure exactly when it hit me, but sometime when I was a teenager I developed a very special connection with my Grandma.  God rest her soul.  I remember one moment of being in her kitchen in Port Chester, New York.  I remember being with my uncles and my grandpa.  It was a night when my Grandma was not mentally lucid.  She was starting to symptoms of dimensia, and she would go in and out of periods of seemingly agonizing pain.  It was not easy to witness this hysteria, and see my grandma so anxious.  But I watched my grandpa who would respond with an inquisitive and calm statement under his breath like, "poor girl- I wonder why she's hallucinating like that".  I observed their relationship for many years- and often saw the love between my grandparents as an idealistic love.  They lived their life for each other.

In this moment, being in the small kitchen, I remember experiencing an epiphany.  I remember thinking to myself how special it was that I was able to come into this world through the ancestry of my Italian grandparents.  That I would not be who I am today if it weren't for the union of my Grandma Bianca and Grandpa Anthony.   I thought of my grandma- and her life as an Italian American immigrant.  My grandma came to America in 1915 (give or take a few years).  She grew up with her Calabrese mother and learned all of the Italian recipes.  Then, I took it upon myself to learn these same recipes.  When I think of the fact that my grandma had six sons (my dad being one of them), and then many grandchildren, I realize that her life impacted so many of us.  In many ways, we all experienced a taste of Italy being with her (literally and figuratively).   It is because of my grandma that I am in Italy today.  I feel connected to this country.

So, as I was sitting at this dinner table with my new Italian friends, and friends from work, I felt the presence of my Grandma.  Of my Italian roots.  I felt connected to my Grandma through the recipe she passed me.  Through the recipe, I felt connected with Italian friends.  Through my Italian friends, I felt connected to Italy.

I hope that after you are all reading this, that you see the importance of spending time with your grandparents.  To take in the culture that you are from- to experience the home cooking and mother tongue language.  To pass on these traditions---to keep the culture alive---to stay connected to your roots.